Monday, June 30, 2008

The lease runs out on my current house at the end of July so I have been looking for a new place with some friends. I hate this process and get so tired of it but this time it has gone pretty smoothly. I am about to go meet our soon-to-be landlord and pay our deposit on a cute little house. I am excited about the place but it is always scary to give someone a lot of money. Eeek! I cant wait to show everyone the house though because I love it! I need to start the downsizing process right now.

Friday, June 27, 2008

I do not talk a ton on here about my mission team and what we are doing so since we made a big decision this week I thought I would share. I don't talk about them not because they are not important, because they are, but because mainly right now we are just hanging out and having fun. As great as that is for us, no one on here wants to read about how we made dinner and played games together. Boring!


This update may be boring too but at least it is something. Anyways, we met on Wednesday night and decided on a tentative date for our next survey trip. Last summer we (me, Reid, Wes, Ellen and Gary) took a pre-survey trip in order to decide where we wanted to be. Now we need to go back to check into more details regarding where we will live, cost of living and probably other things I do not know about (thankfully we have Gary to tell us that stuff).

We had been planning on going back in January but because of a class I need to take and probably Chad does too, weddings, and comps it just won't work for most of us. So half joyful half sad we moved it till next June, pretty much a year from now. Half joyful because I will not have to make a decision between a necessary class and our trip, and half sad because I really want to go back. Half joyful because it will put the trip closer to our actually arrival date and leave less time for the economy and other things to change and mess up our fundraising, and half sad because I want to go now!

This happened a couple of years ago and it actually worked out for the better, although we did not know it at the time. My senior year we (Wes, Ellen, Reid) were hoping to go on our first survey trip that summer and it got pushed back because of Reid's job. We were all disappointed but knew it was for the best. So we put it off till the next summer and only a couple of months before we were going we had to change locations. We were planning on going to Guayaquil, Ecuador but found out that there were other teams training for there and we do not want to overlap on cities before they are all reached. So very quickly we needed to pick a new place and fast. We were given 4 options of cities in need and they were La Paz, Bolivia, Cuidad del Este, Paraguay, Temuco, Chile and Concepcion, Chile. We all put them in order of which we wanted most based on what we knew and we were all over the place. We ended up narrowing down our choices and visited all but Cuidad del Este on our pre-survey trip. The rest is history and now we are going to Concepcion.

What is the moral of the story? Well as much as we may want to go in January it just won't work for everyone and who knows what amazing things may come out of it. Ecuador would have been great but we are all so in love with Chile. These are the experiences we can look back on and remember how faithful God was and how he has a plan for us that we may not have any idea about. We have come so so far since that night at Wes' house over two years ago and right now we are better than I ever imagined with such amazing teammates. Who knows what will happen because of this delay but I am still excited and am waiting in anticipation to see what God does over the next year.
When we decided to push the date back we voiced some concerns about loosing our passion and getting discouraged for have to wait so much longer. This may be true so pray for us please but I have been praying for God to keep this passion alive since I was a senior in high school so I think God can handle another year. We have some ideas of how to help us along and just being together makes me excited. Yea Chile!!!


Thursday, June 26, 2008

Colorado influence me to become a recycler and I really love it. I feel like I am at least doing something. It was an easier process in CO because you just had a bin in your house that you piled high and did not sort and then left it out with the trash every other week. Not a bad deal.

Here in Abilene it is a little harder to recycle but not a problem at all. I just have a trash can in my house labeled recycle and we put our stuff in there and then when it gets full I take it to the Walmart parking lot where they have bins. We do not sort in our house in order to keep from having 5 trash cans so I sort when I get there.

Well I have a very nice surprise when I dropped the recycle off today. When I pulled up I could tell something was different but didn't think too much about it. So I went in order and did the paper, glass, metal cans, aluminum and then I came to plastic and guess what I saw!!! A new container!! And not just a new container but a bigger one and (this is the real kicker) all of the plastics can go into one bin AND they are now not only accepting plastics #1 and #2 but #1 THROUGH #6. I just could not believe it. There were some other people dropping off their stuff and I showed them the new differences and they were happy but I think they thought I was strange for being so excited.

In my mind this new change means two things. One, so many people were recycling that they needed a bigger bin for the plastics that most of the time were overflowing. Two, they are being more conscious of recycling and opening it up to us to be able to recycle even more materials. Hooray for Texas being earth-thoughtful!

This new addition to our recycling bins made my Walmart trip just a little bit better. I cant wait to start recycling almost all of the plastics!

Thursday, June 19, 2008

So I know it has been a few weeks since the LOST finale and we have till January till it comes but I have some friends who are borrowing my DVD's and they are all into it now and it makes me and my LOST friends excited to hear them talk about it. Anyways, I wanted to show this video because I think it wsa probably the best moment on LOST EVER! They deserve to be reunited more than anyone I think. Can you think of a moment that you think tops this one?

Here is an interesting one. I figured this was what he told her and that is what Jack gets mad at Kate about in one of the flash forwards. I don't know how accurate this is but it sounds good.

I also wanted to share this video because I think it is pretty cool. Don't listen if you have not seen the finale!!

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

I felt like such a tree hugger today. I am at work and one of my new duties is to water the plants around the library. How fun is that! Some of them are lookin' pretty bad and need some good lovin'. So I got my book cart and piled it high with water jugs and pulled it around watering the trees and plants. I also cleared out the leaves from the pots and picked off the dead leaves on the trees. So fun! I love taking care of plants and now I get paid for it. It is my job every Wednesday (W for water) and this is serious business. No plants will be dying on my watch! I plan on loving them and nourishing them and maybe even speaking some encouraging words to them. Positive vibes are supposed to help plants you know.

I also take care of my plants at home and am really enjoying them. I have a cute little bed that I water about every other day now since it is so hot. I have some caladiums, some ferns and some other random plant that was in there dying already that I have nursed back to health and now it gets little yellow flowers.

I also have a small rose bush that is doing well and a cherry tomato plant. I am not sure if it is going to survive the hot summer though. It needs lots of sun but after a day of frying in the killer Texas sun it does not look happy. The leaves are droopy and losing their color. I try and water it every day to keep it going but I am not sure if it is enough. I have seen a couple of yellow flowers but I will be surprised if it gets tomatoes. But this is my first time to grow food so it is my guinea pig. I will keep you posted! :)

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

XBOX Wife Ten Things Tuesday

I saw this on someone else's blog and thought it was a great idea. (the pic links to her blog if you want to check it out) It has been a few days since I have blogged and I was looking for something encouraging to write about. So what am I thankful for on this Tuesday?

1. My jobs. I have one job that lets me work when I want and take off when I want. It may not be the most exciting but I am thankful to have anything. I also am so blessed to be cleaning houses for some random people. It is a little extra money for work that I enjoy. It is nice after studying or whatever to go to a quiet house and just do some manual labor for a couple of hours.

2. Abilene in the summer. I have been so surprised how much fun being here in the summer can be. I am blessed to have so many good friends around me to hang out with, be encouraged by, and laugh with.


3. The YMCA. I have posted a couple of times about my Y adventures but I am just so glad to have a membership there. Not only do I get a good workout that makes me feel good, I also get to meet some really fun people.

4. My roommate Shannon. It is just the 2 of us this summer and she has been so wonderful to have around. We have laughed a lot, cried together, moped together, worked out together, watched some movies and read together. I am going to miss her when she is gone for 2 weeks and I am all alone!

5. The internet. I know it sounds like a strange thing to be thankful for but I have been having so much fun lately keeping up with friends who are in different places around the country and world that I would not be able to keep up with otherwise. Blogs are just so fun to read, especially when they have pictures! :)

6. Dr. Pepper. Another simple one but I just love that drink. I tried to quit a few weeks back but I just don't know what I was thinking. I know it is not good for you but man it is so yummy, especially from Sonic!

7. The sun. I know the sun makes it super hot but I really am enjoying the warm weather. I love the feeling of the sun on my skin when I am outside. I also love that the sun makes my plants grow! I have some pretty plants outside my house and I love taking care of them. The could not grow without the sun.

8. My bike. Gas prices are stinkin' high and even though I do not ride anywhere too far on my bike it does save me some gas. I can ride it to the grocery store or to some friend's houses or to clean house, where most of these places would take a while to travel to if I was walking but the bike makes it faster and its a good workout. Actually, my butt does not get sore in cycling class at the Y because it is used to riding my regular bike everyday. I am thankful for anything that helps one more place on my body not be sore.

9. Long time friends. I have a couple friends in my life that I have known for many years and you are wonderful to me. Mandy and Ash I have known you since birth and I love having that history with you and the commitment to keep in touch living in different places. BFF Lauren you are the bestest friend a girl could have. Come back from Hawaii. Randi and Jenee yall don't read this but you experienced the best semester of college with me in Uruguay and we had some crazy fun times together. I am so glad we have kept up and I cannot wait to be in your wedding Jenee. Mere I have known you since we were freshman and I appreciate your loving heart and commitment to me.

10. Last but not least, my mission team. All of us but one (miss you J) are here for the summer and we have so much fun together. I love swimming with the Lukkasons, playing games, cooking together and just hanging out. I am specifically thankful for the ladies on the team and our commitment to each other and our spiritual lives. I love all of you and am so blessed to be going to Chile with yall. I would not want to go with anyone else.


I have so much to be thankful for. This is barely the beginning of the list. What are you thankful for?

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

The YMCA keeps getting better and better! My favorite classes are the ones that get my heart pumping and my skin sweating, but I like to give the other ones a chance. Last week I tried Yoga and it felt good but it was pretty slow and boring. Monday I decided to try a class called Yogalates which should be a mix between Yoga and Pilates. I have done Pilates videos before and they are pretty tough so while I was not expecting to sweat and have a high heart rate I was expecting my muscles to struggle. I was wrong.

We went into this small room with the lights off and yoga mats on the floor. To begin with the CD kept skipping so we did not have any music to listen to. Instead we got to listen to yelling kids, and loud adults pulling furniture around in the next room. Very relaxing for a yoga class.

So I went through the class (and my roommate was there with me) and it was even more boring than yoga. I felt pretty much nothing! It felt good to stretch and maybe I was doing it wrong but it was not hard at all. But the best part was the things the teacher kept saying.

I guess they like to use imagery to help you picture what position you should be putting your body in but some of hers were just silly and made me giggle when I thought about what they would really look like. And some just did not make sense. Here are a few examples:

  • She told us when we were breathing in to imagine balloons under our armpits. Now that is a funny image, but I do not know what she was going for.
  • She would tell us to push our navel to the ground and I never figured out if that meant to suck our stomachs in or flex our abs or what!
  • Oh! And one we had like a chocolate donut around our waists or something and we had to move within it and not touch it. Not sure what that meant either but it sure got me thinking about chocolate!
  • And the best one! We were laying on our backs with our feet on the ground and our knees bent. I think she wanted us to lift our butts/pelvis' into the air which is good for your back or something but can you imagine what she said instead? She told us to imagine we had a dragon tail coming from our tail bones and to tickle our noses with our dragon tail!!!!!!! How crazy is that! I seriously lost it. Roomie said she could not look at me because she knew she would loose it too! That is one interesting image to get us to lift our butts. Wow!
Another thing that was crazy was the breathing she had us do. I guess Yoga and Pilates have different breathing techniques and instead of sticking with one she had us switch back and forth depending on which move we were doing. That was hard to follow and I would get lost on which one we would do. And THEN she was always telling us to exhale and inhale with our moves but sometimes she would say exhale and then no inhale and then exhale again so I would breath out normally and then be like pushing all the air out of my stomach just to stay straight with what she was doing! That was probably the hardest part of the whole thing!

So, I will not be going to Yogalates again. I am sticking with cycling and step and cardio workouts. I even went to a boot camp one the other day. I am sore!!!

Tuesday, June 10, 2008

I know the saying is "don't cry over spilled milk" or something like that, but today I cried over just plain milk. I admit I am a girl and sometimes I am just extra emotional for no real reason. Sometimes it is depressing and sometimes it is just funny. Today was a funny one.

I went to the grocery store which I hate doing but I love eating so the food has to come from somewhere. As mentioned in a earlier post I always have a battle inside myself as to whether I should buy organic or not and I had that battle today. I got regular fruit and then I came to the milk. I just stood in front of all the milks for a while and I started to cry because I could not decide what to do.

Do I spend $7 on super yummy, organic milk? Do I spend $5 on just fine milk that says it does not have hormones and stuff in it? Or do I spend $3.50 on just regular milk that may one day give me cancer? (I don't know if it does this but I would not be surprised) I just do not know what to do. I want the organic but I am also VERY aware that gas prices are going up and I am driving more because of my YMCA membership and some good friends moving across town. So I cried and then I got the cheap milk. So silly! I laughed at myself on the way home.

Life is hard being a rich American with so many decisions that it makes me cry huh?

Sunday, June 8, 2008

I have been going to a new church for a while now that even though I have not gotten super involved yet I really like it. It is probably the smallest church I have ever attended. They do not have membership but I would say each Sunday we might have 75 people at the most. We meet in the evenings and I love the worship and the preaching and the intimacy that comes with a small church.

It is my fault that I am not real involved or getting to know people well because all I do is show up on Sunday nights and then leave after church. It is a great experience for me though to make myself go to a new church were I know few people because it helps me see what visitors see and how hard it can be to go alone. Part of me wants to sit back and say that people need to come up and meet me, but really I know that I need to make the effort too and I hope that happens this summer.

I have very limited experience to make this claim since I have not been in other people's shoes but I think being single, especially being a single girl, might be one of the loneliest and difficult people groups to fall into in the church. I do not blame anyone for this, we just seemed to get looked over. I say girl because on the surface there seems to be less for me to do to get involved. If I were a dude I could do the Lord's Supper or lead a prayer or whatever was needed. Being a girl if I volunteer with anything I am afraid I would get stuck with the kids. I think kids are fine but that is totally not where my gifts are.

So I make myself go to church each week and I usually sit alone with no one I know and I am encouraged by the service but have yet to make many connections. When there is a new couple at church people are interested to meet them and get to know them because couples know what to do with other couples. But what do we do with the single girl? A few people talk to me but I just feel like an alien or like I am wearing a big flashing neon sign that says "hey look I am single and strange!" I cant put my finger on what it is, but it does not feel good.

So if I do not think it feels good then what do single people feel like if they visit a church and they are not Christians or do not have the confidence (or guilt) to keep going even when they do not feel welcome. Are we (the church in general) driving away the single people? How can we be more welcoming?

This happens in large churches just as much or more than small ones. I was going to a larger church to begin with and I felt even more alien. I did not fit with the college kids but did not want to go to the singles class that is full of other aliens! I just wanted to be normal and just be a person. Not a college kid, not a single, not a young professional and not an alien! So I moved to a smaller church and it is somewhat better and I think it totally will be over time but I just hate going alone. It is so much more comfortable to walk into a church with someone else by your side than alone and when you get in you stand at the back trying to decide where to sit and you feel like everyone knows you are the single girl but they do not know what to say to you so they just don't! I am probably exaggerating my feelings some and playing off of the idea that we always think people are thinking way more about us than they are, but whether or not it is true it feels that way and that is not a welcoming feeling. Not to me and not to a visitor.

I have no idea where I am going with this but I hope that if I ever manage to get married that I can remember how it feels to be the alien and try and make others not feel that way. And maybe God wants me to be a single missionary so I can not just be a couple reaching out to the singles but actually be one of them. But I am afraid to think that because I do not want to be the alone alien forever.

(NOTE: I like to go back and read my blogs a day after I write them to make sure I didn't say anything stupid, but this one seems really depressing. I did not mean for it to sound that way. I mean I guess it is not really a joyful topic but I am not depressed or think I am a loser because I am single, I just do not find the church gives much encouragement to singles and I don't want it to be like that. That's all I was going for. Not depressing.)

Every blogger gets the urge to change their layout every once in a while and I got mine today. I saw someones with a really great picture and I wanted one too. I looked around for a good baking picture since by blog is named Dee's Bakery but I didn't find one I liked. So I found this awesome picture of some mountains in Chile instead! These mountains are called Torres del Paine and they are surrounded by a national park in Patagonia. I wanna go!! Really has nothing to do with anything I just love the picture. So after changing the picture I had to change the colors so they looked ok with it but were not too dull since I like bright. Pink and green and other bright colors did not look great with mountains so I went with red. I am pretty happy with it. We will see how long this one lasts. Thanks for reading!

Friday, June 6, 2008

It's summer reading time! (no not in Spanish, sometimes I just have a desire to speak in Spanish and have to find some kind of outlet) I LOVE reading especially when I find a book that is so awesome that I cannot put it down. Summer time is great for this hobby especially since I am in school and usually have to read what someone else tells me to read. These books are sometimes good and sometimes not but rarely are they so good that I cannot put them down.


I have such fun memories of when I was a kid in the summer time. We would go to the public library and check out lots of books for each week. My mom only allowed us so many a week and then each day we would have reading time. I also remember getting that button from Pizza Hut that you put stickers on for each book you read and when you filled it up you got a free personal pan pizza or something like that. Was that just in Oklahoma or everywhere?

So this summer's reading got kicked off with Into Thin Air by Jon Krakauer. He is also the author of Into the Wild that was recently made into a movie. He is kinda an outdoorsy guy who writes about that stuff. This book was about his attempt and success at climbing Mt. Everest with the purpose of writing an article in an outdoor magazine about the commercialization of the mountain. This has occurred because the use of supplemental oxygen has made it easier to climb (still not easy but easier than like Sir Edmund Hillary had it). Another major reason for the commercialization is because of guides. You can pay a professional to guide you up the mountain so pretty much all you have to do is the hiking. They know exactly how long to stay at each camp to get you acclimated to the altitude and have Sherpas who carry up all your gear, set it up and cook for you. Crazy!

Anyways Krakauer made it to the top and back down but 12 people died during that one summit day and the season amounted to the most deaths to that year. Krakauer recounts his experience and all the little mistakes that were made that lead to this devastating event that continues to haunt Krakauer.
The book for me was fascinating in its descriptions of the effects of extremely high altitude and the extreme personalities changes that occurred because of the lack of oxygen to the brain. I was also very impacted by the fight for life that many people put up just to climb this mountain that is littered with trash and oxygen tanks. Rarely in the book does Krakauer remark about the beauty around him or the amazing views. It is just another accomplishment for most people that takes so many lives. I think 1 in 4 people die climbing Everest.

Sound like a depressing book? Well in some ways it was but Krakauer does an amazing job of explaining the drive that people have to climb this mountain and their backgrounds that led them to it. He really helps you to understand all the different people he encountered and makes it clear how mentally altered they were on this mountain that led to so many deaths. I laughed and cried and decided that I NEVER want to go that high. I would LOVE to see Everest but that is as close as I want to get. And yet look at this picture. Such a gorgeous and fierce mountain just calls out to be climbed. Whatever you think you should read this book because I could seriously go on and on about it.
I started book two today and it is The Atonement Child by Francine Rivers. I would not say she is the best author in the world but for any woman interested in a Christian author she is the one for you. She writes in all time periods (not just the wild west like most female Christian authors do) and reaches lots of different ages groups. So far this book is gut wrenching! It is about abortion and you just cant help but cry for the characters that are in so much pain. I am not to far in but it makes me wonder how I would handle such an awful situation.
The next book I want to read is the second and third books in the His Dark Materials series by Philip Pullman. What is this series? Well does The Golden Compass sound familiar? Gasp! A Christian who dares read these heretical books. Yup that's me! I decided to read them when I was driving to Abilene and back from Colorado and it was on sale on itunes. So I listened to the first one and I really enjoyed it. And although I can see where the series is going, so far there is little talk about the church or God. It is just an awesome story written by someone with an amazing imagination. It is less magical as something like Harry Potter but definitely in that same arena. I am excited to read the next books and see what happens because it really leaves you in a cliff hanger!
The last books I hope to read are the Chronicles of Narnia by C.S. Lewis. I have read a couple of them but never seem to finish the series. And every time I read them I start at the beginning and then manage not to get to the end. So it may not happen this summer because these are a lot of books to read but I am going to try hard. Plus I have a week on the river with my family that mainly consists of sleeping, eating, swimming, playing games and reading. Cant wait! So I will let you know if/when I accomplish this awesome reading list for my summer.

Thursday, June 5, 2008

I finally gave in and decided to pay for exercise. I have always been against it knowing that it is free to run but it is so hot right now so I cant run outside plus I only feel comfortable running about 2 miles and that is not enough. So I am officially a YMCA member. I chose the Y because 4 people on my mission team and my roommate have a membership so it is much more fun to go with someone else so you can laugh and look stupid together.

And I promise, I look stupid. I have been trying all the different classes and they are interesting. I took a yoga class but it was a little to chill for me and I wanted more of a workout. I have done cycling classes and I LOVE those! They are a super hard cardio workout and you can make it as hard or easy as you want and the teachers are pretty fun with loud techno, rock music. I love it! Everyone is like grunting and yelling when it gets hard and it just makes me laugh. I join in too.

The funniest class is called cardio mix. The two times I have been have been somewhat different but about the same thing. We use the step (see pic below) for a while and then do some arm toning with hand weights and then some ab work. The first class it took me a while to get the step down but it was not too hard. The arm work was tough and I was yelling out for sure. The ab work was impossible. I did a couple of the exercises and then just got the giggles and could not do anymore. It is hard to laugh and work out your abs.


Yesterday when I did this class the step was WAY more complicated. So complicated that one of the ladies left because she could not keep up. I had trouble but whenever I messed up or got lost I just did my own thing. We did some moves where you have to do the Charleston, a couple where you have to do steps over the step and then you are not even facing the teacher. There are some kicks and knees and just lots of variation. The variation made it hard but also kept it from being boring.

Let me add to this that I am not the most coordinated person. I will try my hardest and maybe even get all the moves right but I just look stiff and gangly and goofy when I try anything like this. So I watch the teacher and try and do what she does but then there is a huge mirror in front of us to watch ourselves and it was all I could do to not laugh at myself. I also would get excited when I would get one of the hard steps right and I would clap or yell out. Sadly this class was not as excited as my others so I just felt silly. It was an experience.

Tonight I am going to a step and sculpt class so we will see how that goes. I love trying new things. I just see this as such an adventure. I go into class and do not know what to expect and even if I go to the same class the teachers vary and they all teach differently so you just have no clue. I love that! This is way more entertaining than running and it is a great workout too.It is also fun to meet people outside of the ACU and CoC bubble. I always get to talk to the teacher after and they are super nice and hopefully I can get to know some of the class regulars too. I actually feel like I am a part of the Abilene community and not just an ACU student. So fun!

NOTE: I went to the step and scuplt class and the steps were more complicated and once I was inches from falling off the step but I saved myself. I am just waiting for the day that it happens.

Tuesday, June 3, 2008

Sometimes I become overwhelmed when I think of all the problems in the world and how much responsibility I have. I feel pulled in so many different ways and I cannot decide what is more important to devote myself to.

For example, I am trying this part-time vegetarian lifestyle. I really like it even though it is difficult sometimes. I will eat meat when I am with groups or if someone else is cooking for me, but when I cook for myself I do not use meat and I do not buy meat. Why? Well I wont go into detail but the way mass productions of farm animals works I do not want to eat their meat or support their business. Also, I just think eating fresh produce just seems healthier. It is more difficult to keep fresh food from going bad and I have been struggling with what meals to cook, but it is going good. Also, I have heard, but have no proof, that if America ate less meat it could help with world poverty.

So I devote myself to a part-time veggie lifestyle but then I also want to eat organic. I do not know how much crap is put into our foods but I know it is not natural and not good and our bodies do not know what to do with it. High fructose corn syrup for example. What the crap is that stuff and why is it in everything? Not good! I obviously have no proof of this but I will not be surprised at all of all of the pesticides and preservatives in our foods gives all of us cancer and Alzheimer’s and those bad diseases. Scary! So I try to eat my fresh food organic. But what is the downside of organic? More expensive!

The next problem is world poverty which means I do not want to put my money towards organic food but to the poor. But does just sending money really help? I don’t know but I do not know what else to do. This is probably the worst one for me that overwhelms me the most because it is sooooooo widespread and devastating and I just sit at home and eat my organic food and try and decide whether to be a veggie or not when most people don’t even have a choice of what they eat. I am such a food snob! Jesus helped the poor and I want to also. I want to live the love of Christ and not just talk about it but I just don’t even know where to start. This even bleeds over into my planning on doing mission work. I am sure it is what I want to do and what God wants for me but sometimes I just want to move to Africa and help the poor somehow. I hope I can help the poor in Chile.

What is a major cause of world poverty? AMERICA! We are the biggest consumer of the worlds resources and if we were not hogging it all maybe the rest of the world would have a chance. I know it is not as easy as that but something has got to change. But what can I do? If I try to live a less consumerist lifestyle that is not even going to make a dent in the world problem. Not that I should not try but it does not make the overwhelming feeling go away because the world just keeps going down the tube.

And speaking of the world going down the tube what about the environment and the animals. I recycle, ride my bike, use reusable grocery bags and energy saving light bulbs but again, is it even making a dent? And what about all the poor animals that are dying because we are taking away their food and their land. What about the polar bears! I don’t know about global warming but I do know we are killing our planet. On this issue America is not the worst but that is only because we have the money to worry about the environment. Places where people do not have enough food to live are not worried about the dying animals or the pollution their poor paying plants are putting out. So to help the environment we need to help the poor. But if our planet is dead it won’t even matter.

Besides world poverty there is so much evil that goes on in our world from corrupt governments, to child prostitution, slave labor, horrible effects of alcohol, and drugs, and AIDS. Man! And don’t even get me started on war. I know I am against it, that’s all I am going to say.

See my problem? Do I need to pick one issue and go with it full force or should I stay committed to each problem and only make a little difference. Do I even have the guts to go full force? I do not want to be annoying and force my ideas on everyone else, especially when I am not well researched, but I also know the more people concerned the bigger difference we can make.

All I can do is remind myself that I am not superman (or Jesus) and it is not my job to fix the world but I feel a huge responsibility to do something. These issues do not even touch on the problem of Christianity in the world. That is a whole other blog! I do think that it is my responsibility as a Christian to be concerned and to try and make a difference and use what I know to help as much as possible.

PS- I wrote this real fast so it might not be expressed very well.